Friday, February 08, 2008

Why did the chicken cross the road?

 

 

 
Read answers to the end

Matiba Ken - Let the pple decide. no short cut....

S. Kivuitu
- am not sure if the chicken crossed the road.The chicken keeper has disappeared with form 16A. Dont ask me again. You can shoot me if you want...

Martha Karua
- this is a legal matter that must be taken to the High court of the animal farm where the eagle is the judge. Thats the tradition

Orengo James
- its vital we first establish if the chicken crossed alone or was it accompanied with anyone,whom we've overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing

Mutula Kilonzo
- it depends upon your frame of reference to see if indeed the chicken crossed or  the road moved beneath it. You shud read all relevant chapters and not just conclude after reading only one chapter

Peter  Nyong'o
- it was looking for equity and social justice

Mutua Alfred
- the chicken never crossed the road. This is a complete fabrication. We dont even have chicken.

Loosy
 (Lucy) - Mimi kama Rais.... najua jibu

Kiraithe
(Police spokesman) - The scene must have been video edited to show the chicken crossing the road yet it was standing

Ruto
- Haki  yetu!!

Kalonzo Musyoka
- it was expecting a miracle across the road

Mzee Moi
- Kuku gitu kani? Siasa mbaya,maisha mbaya

RAILA AMOLO
- had the chicken signed an MOU not to cross the road? Crossing the road is a two- horse affair. Anything else is a donkey!! Besides no one can stop the River Nile.....But if we cross the road as we did on 27th Dec,then we can invite the chicken back to the original side of the road. Raila na mpira.......gooooooaaal

EMILIO MWAI
- Kuku ilivuka palepale,ikienda huko huko........na hilo ndilo jambo la muhimu.......hakuna mambo ingine.......na hatuwezi kataa,tutakataa namna gani? Hakunaaaa!!! Na hao wanaendelea kuongea mambo ya kuku.......ni wapumbavu......mavi ya kuku!!!

Kindergarten teacher
- to get to the other side

Plato
- for the greater good

Aristotle
- its the nature of chickens to cross roads

Karl Marx
- it was a historical inevitability

Martin Luther King
- ..........I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives being called into question

Machiavelli
- The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever motive there was.

Freud
- The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity

Saddam
- this was unprovoked act of rebellion and we were justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it

G.W. Bush
- we dont really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or against us. There's no middle ground

Budha
- asking this question denies your own chicken nature

Isaac Newton
- any chicken in the universe shall always cross a road perpendicularly and in infinitely long straight line at uniform speed unless it stops due to unbalanced reactive force in the opposite direction of the chicken's motion

Charles Darwin
- chickens over periods of time,have been naturally selected in such a way that they're now genetically disposed to cross roads

Nelson Mandela
- Never again,will the chicken be questioned for crossing the road. This is an ideal for which Iam prepared to die

Thabo Mbeki
- we need to establish if really there's a connection btn the chicken and the road

Bob Mugabe
- for all the years the road has been owned by white farmers,the poor underprivileged chicken has waited for too long for that road to be given to him n now he is crossing it in force with fellow war veteran chickens. We shall take over the road and give it the roadless chickens,so that they can cross it without fear of retribution from Britain. We will not stop untill all roadless chickens have roads and the freedom to cross them,even if hunger and 10,000% inflation bites them.

 

 

 


Edit
Bill Clinton: I did not have any relations with that chicken or that road. And for that matter, I did not inhale that chicken.

Arnold Schwazeneger: The chicken crossed the road to get to the chopper. Now everybody get down.

Wangari Maathai: Why do we have to cut all those trees to build one road for just one chicken to cross? Can it not cross a forest? Protest!
Museveni: We congragulate the chicken for having sucessfully crossed the road in a very close race.

British foreign office minister: We don't recognise this crossing. Both chickens took panya roots instead of sticking to the prescribed "straight and narrow".

EU observers: We weren't even allowed to witness the chicken crossing in some places, so this is null and void, and you can take that to the kitchen.

ODMer: Did anyone see a chicken crossing the road? All I saw was a chameloeon and horse racing, and as my kalenjin people would put it, a horse would never beat a chameleon in a race!

Kenyans: We demand that a free and fair road crossing race begins again

8 comments:

  1. Hilarious. A good change.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Museveni: We congragulate the chicken for having sucessfully crossed the road in a very close race.

    British foreign office minister: We don't recognise this crossing. Both chickens took panya roots instead of sticking to the prescribed "straight and narrow".

    EU observers: We weren't even allowed to witness the chicken crossing in some places, so this is null and void, and you can take that to the kitchen.

    ODMer: Did anyone see a chicken crossing the road? All I saw was a chameloeon and horse racing, and as my kalenjin people would put it, a horse would never beat a chameleon in a race!

    Kenyans: We demand that a free and fair road crossing race begins again

    ReplyDelete
  3. Just bloody hilarious:

    Bill Clinton: I did not have any relations with that chicken or that road. And for that matter, I did not inhale that chicken.

    Arnold Schwazeneger: The chicken crossed the road to get to the chopper. Now everybody get down.

    Wangari Maathai: Why do we have to cut all those trees to build one road for just one chicken to cross? Can it not cross a forest? Protest!

    ReplyDelete
  4. i think you missed the part william ruto not only said haki yetu he also killed the chicken as it crossed (sic)

    ReplyDelete
  5. just happened along your blog.....totally wild. The post.....forwarding it to my buddies with utmost urgency.

    ReplyDelete
  6. That's really funny.
    Thank you for posting it.

    ReplyDelete