Monday, June 30, 2008

I could use "INSTANT"

Ever since instant carrot, we no longer cut our own sukumawikis (thanks to Instant), nor meat. Yes please i hope to get someone to cut the onions too.

Don't you just love this Instant era?

We communicate instantly (how is it we survived with the posta Snail mail), waiting for replies forever that is if it were ever delivered. Which reminds me of the KBW card, that was last seen in England (digression 101).

Lemme remember how we used to write the damn letter,

"dear xxxx, i hope you are fine. Thanks for your letter, i received it with many thanks (grammaerrors intended). We are all fine, infact grandmother was sick,,..aiish"

Now we write,
"hy, how r u? M gud. misya".

For the record, don't send me any of those r u's.

Now, what i need is

Instant hair (weaves not applied for) like, braids planting themselves on my head without me having to sit for 6-7 hours in a kibanda.

Instant moods-there is a certain someone i want to manufacture a smile for albeit unwillingly because i am not good at fakery. This time it's important

Instant husband- not really but i mean when i need one then said can disappear when i don't need. Ps/ I still intend to leave alone

I know there are certain instants i can get
Instant nails (ala acrylics)
Instant loving

I mean instant publishing (blogging).

Why wait when you can get the instants?

Friday, June 27, 2008

SATC in Nairobi

Forget Sex and the City, guide to the Nairobi dating scene

For men over 35

Normal? Yes
Playa? Yes go to number two

Conventional wisdom; good men are nabbed before they can learn how to use their money alone.

Number One: Normal, playa
Define normal; not psychotic, has no R-Kelly sort of "in the closet" secrets
Hard to quit the playa life..go to number two

Number Two; Normal, Not Playa

Set Criteria :Income levels

High income

Set new criteria: Religious?

Not been to a church since Pope John Paul was here in '85. Can pass

Set new criteria: Interesting?

Favourite Joke: I passed out while driving my car after drinking

Huh! go to Number three

Number three: normal, not playa, teetotaller, good jokes

Rare type. if you get this one, run to the AG's

Monday, June 23, 2008

Many other things

Nairobi is becoming super active for those with similar interests. Take one bar camp, Sevens, Wapi, Tusker Project FAME grand finale all on the same weekend!

There is no more techie in me that goes beyond writing this blog. Thank you blogger. But i attended albeit very late,the Bar Camp Nairobi finally meeting Hash. Even if i half understood half of what was going on, i caught on one that i finally could understand, the renewable sources. But even then it would be good to know what kind of things the folks at Blogger go through and naturally i am a curious person.

What i saw
People of young age interested in changing their lives and hence the lives of many Kenyans. Wealth creation in Kenya is a topic that deals me headaches, think of it just how much can you do with scarce resources. But even then, lets hope we are going to translate these super ideas into cash!

The thing with Blog world is that it introduces you to fantastic people who you would probably have never met who are all interested in doing things to change things around them. Most people in Kenya are stuck in the problem phase, solutions are rarely provided.

Anyway i went for Sevens a bit. The Kenyans can cheer and drink.

Thursday, June 19, 2008


I wish i could have conducted a poll on this one.

  • Matatu Drivers take the accolades- they are loud,  act like they have a right of way, don't care about traffic rules and generally represent what ill manners look like. Plus their conductors

  • Stock brokers are fast gaining the name rogue and wayward- this need not be explained

  • Civil Servants- though no longer known as the people who hang the coats on the chair while pretending to be at work the whole day, . Civil servants have not really changed and i don't expect them to. They still blatantly ask for bribes to do work they should be doing. Lets just say 99% make the other 1% look bad. 

  • Industries - They join this index for making Nairobi River look like a dumping site or worse. 

  • The Transport Minister- I don't know what this guy does, maybe he should explain to us via the notorious Government Spokesman. 

  • Members of Parliament- Nothing good can be said of these people. They know how to debate on many issues concerning how to raise their money, how to use their money and how to have money after they leave parliament. Very progressive indeed.

  • The Standard newspapers- I don't know if this Newspaper knows there are many things that exist in Kenya beyond their cheap political rhetoric.

  • The City Planners -and who are they?
  • All those people who come on Tv and say "Tunaomba Serikali itusaidie"

Tuesday, June 17, 2008


People say sometimes that Beauty is only superficial. That may be so. But at least it is not so superficial as Thought is. To me, Beauty is the wonder of wonders. It is only shallow people who do not judge by appearances.
Oscar Wilde

The Judges at Tusker Project Fame and Idols are in distress. This is from the decision of the public to save Hemedi Suleiman and Cynthia Kuto despite their apparent lack of strong singing talent. See no much probs with Cynthia but Hemedi (ngai fafa!). And they are not hiding it.

I almost went under cover, hearing Hemedi sing New York, New York, Frank Sinatra's precious song. It was first destroyed by Susan Mayer (Teri Hatcher) in Desperate Housewives. Gosh that song will never be the same again. 

Ian could be heard saying terrible, intolerable (not), deplorable.

But all the same if i was a contestant, i would save Hemedi any day. Why? He  is not competition enough. I wouldn't pull an Alvan then end up without a Benz ati "For love"whaddf**k

Monday, June 16, 2008


Don't get me wrong (disclaimer)

After the Harambee Stars match, the stars started singing "Obama, Oliech, Odinga". Point being?

The win was ecstatic with thousands of Kenyans watching the match aside from that so not welcome tribal insinuation. The stars should remember all Kenyans are with them regardless.

And that not in football alone

When ODM fronted a Kipsigis by name Nge'no, Nkaissery could no longer understand democracy, it was tribal issues again. NO way could a Kipsigis lead the Maasais. Wow!

When Esther Passaris fronted herself she said "Ni Muthoni" just to appeal to the larger Kikuyu community of Embakasi and she stated rightfully of course that her mother hails from Naromoru.  That didn't work for her even if i really wanted her to win. I was negatively touched by her appeals. I think she is a brilliant strong person and she didn't have to go to that extent to appeal to the voters.

Somethings just won't magically disappear.

Friday, June 13, 2008

New Trick Questions.

So if you are a young twenty something female going on interview in Kenya you expect this questions for reals

Are you single
the answer to this one is lose-lose
You have come to look for husband in our company

you will soon be married
you will be pregnant soon
and need 4 months off

Verdict: not hired

Are you single
Next question
Are you married
Are you engaged

Lets see
Married without children
You are going to get some soon and yes need 4 months leave to pop

 Married with probs one child (hey20 something)
Have you finished with the family you know (22, huh, obviously not!)
You will need 4 months leave

Verdict: Not hired.