Friday, July 29, 2005
Playing by the Rules
There is the much celebrated sexual liberation, gender empowerment cum freedom, and on the other hand, the ever increasing/decreasing men to women ratio 6:1. Is it true anyway. The not so long ago, hard to get elusive African woman is gone making the good girls have their day in this strange world of dating .
Men on the other hand are having their field day or so I believe with the number of available women at least trying to get them walk down the aisle. The number of a woman sob story of (how he married that bitch) is becoming common. The sorry man obviously caught in who do I marry now is seizing the opportunity to get as many women in bed as he can before the d-day or what they call sanctioned sex day. (Huh)
Tony Mochama on a Sunday Standard (Men Only claims that the birds these days have lost it. And in his one of his rare sober article attributes it to not playing by the rules. Being there at the right time whatever that means. How do you explain how a man will date a woman for seven years and abandon her only to marry the girl he has only dated for six months.
While many women these days will not hesitate to give their men a call at any opportune time, Michelle she of the Irresistible Woman book, states a woman should by the rules that her mama taught her. Women do not call , do not propose, do not chase after the man. And blah blah. I And to add to Tony Mochama’s article, he says that laughing and mingling with his friends will only make you one of his boys and not his missus.
For a long time I believed that a relationship is a mutual thing and doesn’t matter who did what, hang up the phone first crap. I believed and still do in gender empowerment. That women have a right to get what they want. But I am told I am wrong .
But tell me should a woman play by the rules?
The only solution a sexually liberated woman is to separate her feelings of love and lust. A woman can't still understand how a man will bed her and not feel anything for her. A woman, (unless you are a twilight gal) might lust but at the end of the day still think that at least you should call her the morning after.
I am at loss. At this point, I wish my blog was anonymous but since it is not , I will rest my case there.
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Life nowadays seems to be a game with no rules...
ReplyDeleteWe can choose to be actors in the grand, uncontrollable play called the game of life OR directors of that small, but controllable, stage production called my life...
I say that ladies should set their own rules and play by them...
I'd say just be honest and make it clear you expect honesty back!
ReplyDeleteAnd don't necessarily take all indications you receive from the other at face value :)
That's my 2 cents
Rules as set by WHO?
ReplyDeleteThis is a very important question to ask yourself as a person before you go doing things that might end in broken hearts and bones;
I really desest it when someone decides to justify sleeping around with "there are 5 women to 1 man. where??
@milonare,which rules do you think should be set by ladies
ReplyDelete@digz guy,expect what
@prousette,i don't know what to say.
shiroh,
ReplyDeleteI agree with poi...
The rules vary from individual to individual. The key thing is that the lady does what she is comfortable doing with a clear conscience and a good understanding of who she is. Yes, you may change your rules as you progress, yes you may make mistakes along the way... BUT the rules and mistakes must be yours, not someone else's
I think if you play by set rules (from books movies etc etc ) you arent open with each other. If you are the kind that initiates all sorts then playing by the rules means that you arent being yourself. If someone cant accept you for who you are then you are better of without him/her.
ReplyDeleteI personally think the only hard and fast rule in life, is to be a good person. And we all know not everyone lives up to that one. Everything else i think, is really about choice. Yours.
ReplyDelete@poi, i think i will agree with you this time.
ReplyDelete@farmgal,there are those basic rules instict or otherwise.
@Ms K,being a good person is easy. Only that we are too selfish looking at what we get and ofcourse safeguarding our hearts.
Never been a fan of these rules myself. They just make an already complicated life even more complicated! I mean, if you're adults its irrelvenat who called last, etc
ReplyDeleteI am unfortunately a no rules person, I wouldnt even tell you what those rules are. You cannot be responsible for what other people do, but you are responsible for you, so do what YOU feel is best for you... being true to yourself is the only way to go and if someone isnt happy with that, then they have no business in your life!
ReplyDeleteIMHO
What the hic heck do you burp mean by hic one of my uck rare sober hic atrikles? But, yes, the number of women trying to get guys down the aisle these days is pathetic! what happened to rubs without strings?? tony mochama
ReplyDelete