Thursday, September 20, 2007

Marketing to Kenyans & Kenyans

I am no guru of marketing, i might not even know what marketing is per se but i think i know one or two things about Kenyan spending habits. Wuz reading how the South African biasharas have all flopped here in Kenya.

  1. There is nothing like "High end" or such words for us people. Like you can smell death of high end fashion stores everytime one is open. What do you think would happen to the likes of "The Stanley" if there were no tourists in Kenya. Scary huh, before you open anything for the high end, think twice.
  2. We are mostly rural too. Most of your executive didn't even wear shoes while attending school o.k. Ask Naikuni, ask Mwebesa if they wore shoes to school. They didn't. That is for supporting number 1. You understand point 1 is no high end. I am done with point 1.
  3. We do things. Repeat "WE". If my friend does threading in Salon X, there is a likelyhood WE are all going there. You remember the advertisement "Bring one, get one free" very good marketing. One person comes with whole clan. So if i give you a contract to shona my nguos do them well. WE will soon be coming all of us. But then again you lose ME you lose WE.
  4. The Young girl. Co-operative Bank started it, every bank is at it.
  5. Its funny, most large cars are found in dingy joints with fat waitresses by name Njeri or Wambui or whatefa, Ok thats point 1 still
SHOW BIZ SCANDALS
There is one thing about talent and arts, they don't forgive! For example there is Angie Stone and then there is Beyonce. Getta what i mean, 2030 you might still be listening to Angie, Beyonce???

Now we all know that we give things to people we know most likely or those who live fantastic lives like ourselves.

Anyway

Top on the list is your Truly Jeff, the Oduori in Big Brother 11. Somebody tell me we couldn't have done better. Everyday i meet new people largely interesting. Kenyans are by and large really funny you know what i mean. It could be from the circumcision songs after a few beers in the village or even sleeping in the valleys after a night out. Now seriously why did we deserve the humiliation of being ejected just shortly after Big Brother begins. Is it true that Mnet Kenya couldn't find a better person to represent our country peoples? I smell an Anglo leasing, it takes a moment to find out if one is fun whether or not they have written a book! Get my point

Then there was Valerie Kimani of Tusker Project Fame. We all watched Linda and Alvan in great admiration. The die was cast, Linda or Alvan. What did we get Valerie, she alright but she has a terribly weak voice at least mine is hoarse. Almost an year later, we are yet to hear from this gal apart from she has lost weight considerably. And what was to be lost, bones?? She must have told her family to buy so much airtime that she won that thing. I say again Sham! We were expecting miracles, good album we are humiliated once again.

Ruka juu, Banjuka tu life ni fupi na mi sijifungi. National anthem in Kenya. I mean talking bout Kisima Awards. What is the use of Kisima Sham Awards. Why do you waste so much money on such a significant show and then sham it!! We all know DNA deserved to win. We also know Nikki did not deserve to win over Nyota Ndogo. Jameni as she would say, who has the sweetest voice in Kenya. Nikki, Nyota Ndogo? It is not even a matter of debate. How now??

And again i say, arts is not forgiving, you are either with it or you are not.