Monday, January 22, 2007

Just my opinion

I have not had a chance to comment on all those things that go on in the crazy Kenya of ours. But since i have been tempted to come out of the woodwork and defend my namesake Bishop Margaret Wanjiru but not just for the sake of name.

I will say without blinking an eye that James Kamangu Ndimu joins the list of most pathetic Kenyan individuals who think it is alright to disperse sperm and sire then claim later that "I am the father of these children" So what? That is the most ubiquitous and ignorant statement i have heard in my life.

In all these unnecessary melee of paternity, marriage or what not, somehow the patriachal society we proudly believe and sing and partake of it as if it is uji for breakfast majority of Kenyan individuals whether by sheer ignorance or utmost stupidity believe that Kamangu should have a right to his wife " sigh". Now,why not then?

So what if our acts of copulation sired children? but not to simply dismiss these acts as there was a second time. But that is the past.

I dont believe that it is right for a child to denounce his father as the Wanjiru son did, infact in all this story that was the worst thing that happened. A child cannot denounce his father period.

But apart from knowing that Kamangu the man whose partakings must be cheaper than even the changaa Wanjiru thought he takes. The damn man could even talk without shaking uncontrollably. Yet, the man seems ready to tell the whole world that he is the father of her sons. That is as far as it goes.

In any case to me, i saw the epitome of irresponsibility, the ignorance of our men and women because i will not/ refuse to understand that the father owes his sons numerous responsibilities. First as a role model and secondly as a provider. Wanjiru had provided Kamangu (if at all) with two sons. Any African man will tell you how proud that makes him. But not Kamangu. The only connection he seems to have with his sons is that of sleeping with their mother and making her pregnant. So much!

Then to add insult to injury comes some amorphous group of men declaring that Wanjiru and Kamangu must share property equally . Obviously they have no idea when this happens. Because all along these irresponsible father of two sons had this idea that perhaps Wanjiru could now make him very rich. Ooh how sweet.
Look here
I take care of your sons shilling after shilling, go to school, and now you want my property. Why lie twisting of his head looks like a very lenient sentence to that dude. I will and continue to feel those women whose husbands (claimed or otherwise) forsake them (God forbid), date and court another (leaves them) and when her life is almost complete comes to proclaim that she is my common law wife (Ashindwe mara mbili)

I am the only few that seems to agree that James Kamangu should be treated with the utmost contempt that he deserves.


  1. "So what if our acts of copulation sired children?"

    "acts of copulation" (2 of them for that matter) which result in kids should not be dismissed with such contemptuous nonchalance simply by virtue of having happened "in the past"

    The past defines the present and must thus be relevant. Wanjiru cannot escape that fact, try as she might. Just because James Kamangu Ndimu is a pauper doesn't make him worthless. I am sure Wanjiru regrets doing two rounds with the guy but hindsight is always 20-20. The fact that she declared openly in church something to the tune of "the guy can get a rope and hang himself and she'll attend the funeral" shows clearly, the absence of God-inspired thoughts. I think Wanjiru deserves as much blame as Kamangu

  2. The issue is not how good or bad Kamangu was as a father but the fact that the Bishop wilfuly chose to disregard a union that she was still in.
    I doubt Kamangu wanted her back but what he was stating is that via traditional marriage she was still his wife. That is the thing you seem to be ignoring.
    If Wanjiru wanted out she should just refund his dowry with interest from her lunch money and move on, instead of pouring scorn on him and other poor people. And about claiming half of the property, I am not for it at all but I am sure if roles would have been reversed you would have been all for it.
    Mistakes have been made on both sides I agree but the Bishop should do the right thing and follow the right channels instead of spewing bile and having reporters assualted. Frankly her actions and self righteous veneer disgust me to no end.

  3. "Frankly her actions and self righteous veneer disgust me to no end"
    I couldn't have put it any better Acolyte.
    How does one claim to be a Bishop yet they would gladly participate in the murder and funeral of their children's God's chosen father?
    Wanjiru doesn't owe Kamangu any money and Kamangua has no right to demand any.
    However she owes him respect and regard as a fellow human being who breathes the same air Wanjiru inhales from her pulpit of self righteousness.
    If I was a member of JIAM I would demand an apology from Wanjiru for going against God's teaching of forgiveness and respect for all.

  4. Sup Shiroh

    I think the bishop should have advised her son that (and I may be wrong) the bible says honor your father and mother...

    Nuff said...

  5. The Bishop's conduct in this matter is an issue of public concern especially considering that she not only wields real power over her congregation, but has also declared her intention to vie for the Starehe seat in Parliament.

    If indeed she is still married to Mr. Kamangu, then her impending nuptials betray a wilful ignorance of the law and Mr. Kamangu is to be commended for bringing this to light.

    Secondly, her attitude towards the less fortunate in society should be a lesson to her would-be constituents.

  6. "Then to add insult to injury comes some amorphous group of men declaring that Wanjiru and Kamangu must share property equally"

    Yes it is rather interesting that even those who supposedly consider "him" the father, balk at the suggestion that property should be equally divided with the man who has not played a role in their lives for some decades now!

    But perhaps even more surprising has been the silence of the Kenyan feminist voice, who were so willing even to come to the defense even of the First Lady after her attack at the Standard.

    The silence is telling indeed!

  7. sEMA mREMBO.

    The man is a PIG. Stinky ass pig with eeky fingers and he is a drunk and wife beater!! And hell yes, he was only a sperm donor to those kids.

    Wanjiru stands corrected in using bad language as a role model and in lying that he is not the father.....she should have given me the speech to read for her....Her statement of choice should have been "the good for nothing bastatrd shagged me twice,my bad, i got his babies, he refused to take care of them and said we will never step foot in his junk Datsun ("Dastun" to kamangu thank you...the man can't speak English for shite)and the only claim he has to these kids is sperm". She should never have lied about him not being the sperm donor....
    Period. Men should stop thinking that sperm donation makes them fathers. A father needs to be there through thick and thin. Ughh!! Stupid ka-fekking-mangu.

    Oh well, who cares. He is looooosssseeeerrr, ebu he goes jengas his pots na huko.

    When Sunkuli denied his copy right child in public...did anyone ask anything? Nah!! He did not even offer child support.....
    As for Wanjiru (who I think like any other 'evangelist" milks poor people dry by false promises of hope, but then again if you are poor and that gullible...shauri yako...and I in no way feel her spiritual mumbo jumbo)I identify with her as a woman. So shit mama, the man is a loser...fekking hell! tell him to go shit in his hat!!!

    **KM exits with an ulcer**

    Sweetie, how goes?

  8. this mama i won't lie is tactless. hii kitu angemaliza na sentence mbili. 'yes, they are his children. since it's a personal matter we are now sorting things privately.'

    sasa alienda kuanika tu mangotha kila mahali. i don't see her surviving politics.

  9. How about this. A couple gets married in shags and after they have lived together for a few years, they kosana and the man takes off to seek his fortune in Nairobi. Once in the great city, he applies himself to his chosen profession and slowly makes his way to the the top, in the process amassing a fortune. About ten years later, once he has located and secured the affections of a new gacungwa, his shags wife appears out of nowhere claiming her "rightful" share of "their property". After being dismissed as a jigger infested busybody, she approaches FIDA for help.

    Who would bet against FIDA instantly taking up the case and using it as an example of men's dastardly lack of respect for their wives? I'm sure the poor fellow would be publicly excoriated for abandoning his wife and forsaking his responsibilities.

    It is my considered opinion that society applies a double standard in these cases. And before I am accused of taking sides, let me state that it is not my intention to whitewash Mr. Kamangu. I do not know him but from what I have read, he simply wanted his dowry back (which I gather he is entitled to under Gikuyu customs). No one seems to have considered the possibility that it was the obviously ambitious and entrepreneurial Wanjiru who chose abandon a peasant's existence with him in search for fame and fortune in Nairobi. KM's allegations of wife beating are new to me and I wish she would substantiate. Otherwise, her spiteful rant sounds very much like Bishop's.

  10. @ Gathara
    I agree with you, smearing Kamangu's reputation is no good at all. There are two sides to every story. Where does the story of wife beating and mistreatment come in? Kamangu may have been negligent or Wanjiru may have decided to move on without him to her higher calling or maybe even her demons when she was a witch told her to dedicate herself totally to them and not a man.
    I don't see how lying especially by a lady of the cloth is justifiable at all. The birth certificates exist and what kind of testimony is she giving.
    Whether he is a loser, can't speak english or is a drunk at the end of the day according to traditional marriage rites he is her husband. She should have taken care of that before she ran off to carouse with her south african boy toy and all this drama wouldn't be going on.
    A bit of tact and wisdom would have not found her in this position. She will get her wedding but at the end of the day, she has done her reputation harm that it will take years to recover from. Plus I don't see the the voters of Kasarani voting for her after the scorn she poured on them for being poor. At the end of the day, two wrongs never make a right no matter what.

  11. @ Gathara
    Speaking of double standards, when a woman leaves her husband; he is to blame. When a man leaves his wife; he is to blame. Read repeat and memorise for future reference.

  12. @ Gathara

    You prolly did not see it in the news but Wanjiru's former sister/auntie in law (people from Kamangu's side rather), suffered slight foot in the mouth and said "Wanjiru ana-kataa alikuwa ameolewa na alikuwa nakuja kwetu akichwapwa", loosely "wanjiru is refusing to acknowledge the man yet when he beat her, she would come to us for refuge".
    LOL, someone please call me silly. Give the man his 3000 bob and tell him to get his walk on. ANd none of that compounding the cash to present value seeing as he was never there over the time. Uh, maybe they will give his dowry back, but if it were me...he wouldn't get shite!NOTHING! I would sue him to the last pot and jigger on his hands!!
    Kwani he fucked me for free? Kwani those kids were eating stones?
    He was never there for the kids, yes, she should have said he is their biological father, and she stands corrected in her lack of tact...end of. He is no more than a sperm donor to them. Uh, and as for her S.A toyboy... I don't know if anyone has anything to say about the fact that the man actually married after Wanjiru and the second wife that case, did his second marriage negate his first? Yeah, the guy can fuck around but the woman should not.
    Absolute crap.

  13. KM,
    First, I did not see that particular clip but I'll take your word for it that they actually commited the said faux pas.

    Second, I assume from your statement on dowry that you consider dowry to be payment for the privilege of fucking women. In which case you are labeling many women, including Wanjiru and my mother, prostitutes. That is a stance I cannot agree to.

    Third, if Kamangu married ten women under African Customary Law, then he would have been well within his rights. Kenya recognises three types of marriages and depending on which law he choses to get married under, a man can either have multiple wives or be arrested for bigamy. Does this discriminate against women? Absolutely! Is it crap? For sure. But it is the law.

  14. @ Gathara
    Thank you for saying exactly what I wanted to say.
    Well even if Wanjiru was being mistreated and left, customary marriage has procedures when it comes to such issues. She should have consulted the families concerned so he could either be fined or his dowry returned and the marriage annulled. Just because he had sex with her a certain number of times does not all of a sudden absolve the marriage and I dont think as you said that traditional marriage runs on a per sexual encounter basis.
    As for Kamangu being able to "fuck around" traditional marriage allows multiple wives which is different from sleeping around. Yes many parties may not agree with polygamy so the only thing I can say is that they should take it up with their local legislator, village elder and parish.
    At the end of the day both parties are at fault.

  15. Some old lady who I really cherish once made a statement which comes to mind at the moment re: marital disputes.

    Never ever sit in judgement over issues that were decided by two people when they were naked. We do not know what went on between the bishop and mr. kamangu and we never will.

    Whatever the man has/not done is neither here nor there. The bishop as a leader and role model to many should not have used the pulpit to settle scores and say things that left a very bad taste in the mouth. Doesn't she have PR people to advise her?

    Yes the man might have beaten her etc etc. But he is the father of those children and it is no use denying it.

    I have a very big problem with the Maendeleo ya wanaume who showed up insisting that they should go back and live together. That is a decision to be made by the two people concerned.

    If we flip the story Kamangu was in Wanjiru's shoes i.e he was rolling in cash and Wanjiru had earlier abandoned him with the two children can you imagine the reaction? There would have been a few choice words thrown in the woman's direction that would blanch her skin off.

    Shiro sorry for running on and on...

  16. Sermon of the Day: Beware who you sleep with today- you might not need them tomorrow when God gives you a better man!

  17. LMAO. Wacha i tafuta popcorn and watch this movie. Personally, i care less about Mama Bishop who she decided to kamata in her spare time.

  18. I think the key concept in customary marriage law is or should be responsibility.

    Kamangu did not raise his kids, did not go after his wife & kids, did not go back for his cows or was it sh 3000...aai!

    I guess he was waiting for the priestess to raise the kids, return the cows..and do everything.

    And the customary law is still on his side? that law is an arse then...

    vipi shiroh?

  19. Me thinks both sides could have handled this better...
    Nuff said

  20. I find this Wanjiru-Kamangu situation very interesting. For the record, I support Wanjiru. I don't see any double standard. If roles were reversed and a father raised his kids after being abandoned by the mother and she showed up years later, she would have no claim to the kids or his wealth. Women who claim a man's wealth are justified if they had to sacrifice and raise the kids alone while the man lives in luxury--child support!

    Kamangu is a pathetic loser because of his method of publicizing this issue as his ex announces her engagement. He's obviously irresponsible, never being involved with his kids then suddenly showing up now. He has no claim to their success. Furthermore, he was in another marriage after Wanjiru.

    Btw, Wanjiru did apologize for her outburst on a radio show.

  21. Private manenos should remain just that - Private. Airing dirty laundry in public will never do. Both parties certainly did not behave like adults. But worst part of the drama was the kids disowning their father.

  22. gee, my post on soccer commentators pales in comparison. I ought to blog on The Real Stuff...