Monday, March 31, 2008

don't ask for advice; if you don't need it

There are a breed of people who just tire me; those that come to ask you for advice that they don't need.

My life could be entirely stress free if i could come up with such sentences

Candy is
but Liquor
is quicker

Yeah but mofos still think i should spend my life listening to their problems and worse still going back to their undesired state of life even after burdening me with the same.

I happen to be a keen follower of DNA's one hit wonder lyric
"Si tuna shida zetu, tusikize zako kwa nini?"

By the way its not that i do not love to help out people. Infact i am a very good listener or rather extremely good one. But when you ask me for advice about something, i do not expect you to follow it to the letter but i do not expect you to go back to the same so called stress after one day.

The space i have in my hard disk (head) is preserved for important matters.

Ok so where is this going

A gal comes gives you of a story of how the friend is draining her. You advise that is not proper for any kind of a relationship to be draining. Two days later they come hand in hand as if in mock.

Because i am getting tired of what these people did i will simply just say if your relationship with whatever, boy/girl, girl/girl, mother/daughter is draining you and you still intend to stick by it write all the problems that happen within in a journal!

I do tell people my problems only when i intend to do something about it. It's a waste of valuable mental space to keep bitching to all and sundry about your stressful relationship which you intend not to terminate.

I have no time nor space for people's mundane outbursts meant to seek sympathy.

Friday, March 28, 2008

the pain of the lovelorn

I can besure many people have been lovelorn at some point of their dating life.

     adj : unhappy in love; suffering from unrequited love [syn: bereft,

this is when you expect that the love you give will be returned but instead pain is all you feel.
That's the story of my friend. His girlfriend (or ex) is the total b.

I wonder why people find it easy to tear up somebody's self esteem by criticizing everything they do. The girl expects the guy to go out of his way, fetch her from wherever she is and worship her basically but won't do anything in return. The worst part is the guy is totally in love with her and he thinks he can't do without her. He says they have fought many times and made up but he is admitting he is now totally fed up with this chic.

I won't though be surprised if they are back together before i can battle my eyelid.

She tores into his everything, his eating habits, his driving, his dressing!!!

I told him though no one rides your back unless you bend and that is something i believe in completely. I would never let anyone tear into my self esteem. If you think i am not totally enough for you the way i am, why should i keep dragging you in my life.

Love is a difficult issue to deal with because it is something one barely understands anyway. So i ask him if there is anything that girl does that is so wonderful when she is not tearing into his life, he was at pains to explain!

He tells me she throws drama, embarrasses him in front of people and has made a hobby to cause drama even in front of his friend.

And that is not even the first friend i have had who has been mistreated like that. This dude had to deal with this mama who never stopped to remind him how lucky he was to have her! I once met her throwing tantrums at him on the street and i was so embarassed that i just passed the dude because i didn't want him to realize that i had noticed he was being harassed on the streets. Thank God he was finally able to get out of that relationship. And you know what was most interesting is that mama kept bugging him to take her back.  He never looked back!

If i was this dude i would take the nearest bata shoes and run for dear life!

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Things i learnt from TZ

1. We don't sell  until you greet us! salamu kwanza
2. If you push for service you get none.
3. If you wanted to do your things faster, wake up earlier. Usituharakishe bana.
4. We don't sell everything to you. We don't sell whole packets, what will the next person buy?
5. Pole dancing, what is that?
6. You Kenyans ni wajeuri
7. You don't drink your whole beer, share please.
8.I am the ministers driver, bow down when you see me LOL

Anyway i hope ya'll had a great Easter! I did.


We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.

Monday, March 17, 2008

Tag 2- The absence of creativity

1.Taken a picture completely naked?

2. Made out with a friend on your MySpace/Facebook page?

3. Danced in front of your mirror naked?

4. Told a lie?
Yes, but i don't like doing it.

5. Had feelings for someone who didn't have them back?
ooh yes.

6. Been arrested?

7. Made out with someone of the same sex?

8. Seen someone die?

9. Slept in until 5pm?

10. Had sex at work?
well never have. But thanks for the idea.

11. Fallen asleep at work/school?

12. Held a snake?
13. Ran a red light?

14. Been suspended from school?

15. Totaled your car in an accident?
well no because i have none.

16. Pole danced?

17. Smoked?
when i was totally high, i stopped though

18. Been fired from a job?

19. Sang karaoke?
Yes. After 12 straight hours of alcohol.

20. Done something you told yourself you wouldn't?
Yes i have like today.

21. Laughed until a drink came out your nose?

22. Caught a snowflake on your tongue?
In the village, i think it snows.

23. Kissed in the rain?
Not yet.
24. Sang in the shower?
Ooh yes i do

25. Given your private parts a nickname?
trick question

26. Ever gone out without underwear?

27. Sat on a roof top?

28. Played chicken?
Yes. rarely though.

29. Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on?

30. Broken a bone?
31. Mooned/flashed someone?

32. Shaved your head?
Last time '95
33. Slept naked?
Yes, when its very hot

34. Played a prank on someone?
Ooh yes

35. Had a gym membership?

36. Felt like killing someone?

37. Made your girlfriend/boyfriend cry?

38. Cried over someone you were in love with?
Ooh yeah for almost 2 year. ..daft?

39. Had sex more than 10 times in one day?
Hehehe, are there such studs. 10 times aiih. no

40. Had Mexican jumping beans for pets?

41. Been in a band?

42. Subscribed to Maxim?
NO subscriptions.

43. Taken more than 10 shots of alcohol?
eeeh he. thats a tricky one (peter marangi 07)

44. Shot a gun?

45. Had sex today?
No. I am a single woman.

46. Played strip poker?
Yes. not divulging details

47. Tripped on mushrooms?

48. Donated blood?
49. Videotaped yourself having sex?

50. Eaten alligator meat?


51. Ever jump out of an airplane?


52. Have you been to more than 10 countries?

53. Ever wanted to have sex with a platonic friend?
Platonic friends are there because we don't want to have sex with them in the first place. Not ruling it out though.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Tag I am It

One of my favourite bloggers for real is back with a tag

Random things about Shiroh not Girl in the Meadow

  1. I have a conscience and a deep one. I am not the kind of person who can do crazy stuff and feel like i did nothing. On the surface it appears so but my God it affects sometimes i just ran to the adoration chapel and feel like crying.
  2. I can't date light coloured men...there you have it...sawwrrrrry. They don't attract me at all. maybe its because the ones i have have turned out weak but that doesn't mean all are that's just my experiences.
  3. Well to be honest, i find it hard to forgive people at least completely. I cannot stand personal attacks. So if you are fond of telling me of just how fat i am or such kind juz know i aint into it!!
  4. I luuuurve Music totally. from country  to Mugiithi to anything with beats i am into it. I sometimes sing on the streets so guys stop and ask "ati?" Idle Kenyans!!! When the music is good i am at Zen or is it Nirvana??
  5. I like experimenting. People get caught up in my experiments.   And then Numero 1 comes to haunt me and i feel like shyt for a few days. Enough said.
  6. I am right handed, left footed. When i go for aerobics you never know what happens. The instructor says right leg curl, i do left leg curl, says right hand i do left leg right hand. Jesus!! Thanks God for aerobics i am learning to co-ordinate my movements.
I tag

Wednesday, March 05, 2008


When i write this blog, i do not write to offer legal advice, i write it as a common Kenyan, a private citizen of the beautiful country known as Kenya.
And that's whey i write it using simple english instead of legalese. If i wanted to make my blog complicated i would any day...but i wish not. Thats why i write about things people resonate with; matatus, KISS 100, the MKs and anything that happen daily on the street. I wonder if i started writing technical stuff i would have a following. Maybe its time i started to look all techie by the way i admire those who can hack that techie stuff, its not for me simply.
i have every right to reason like a common Kenyan.
however there are few people who think i owe them apologies for writing what i write in this blog.
Let me make it clear that
1. I don't owe anyone any apologies for my narrow minded views.
2. I don't have to agree with the general populance to be open minded
3. You don't have to be my friend
4. If you have any views/opinions put them in your blog don't come to my blog to insult me in the name of dissenting with me.
5. Some things are reality like the fact that a Luo brother might have a hard time taking a Kikuyu sister to his mother. It need not be like that, but that is the way it is. It ought not to be, but it is a reality in Kenya and that was even before this PNU/ODM thingie started going on. Me stating it does not mean that is the position i personally take. I recently told someone what i write on this blog is more influenced by the people on the street than me. I eavesdrop a lot!
6. If there is anything i can do, i will still do it and i don't have to tell everyone i did it; look i am not a celebutard!
7. I appreciate my blog readers extremely especially those who disagree with me e.g. KIP but that doesn't mean you insult me! By coming to ask me if i am lawyer, kwani i offer legal advice on this blog?
I can go on and on because i have been very tolerant. I have been recommended for among other blanket party. Others have written whole posts on how a lawyer can be a tribalist, how some people have paranoia, innuendos just because i took a different view from them during this very trying times in our country. I don't have to agree with everyone. I however would do anything to ease the suffering of a Kenyan.
Look when i started this blog i didn't know anyone, i have met great friends but that doesn't mean great friends can't have different views without insults. With time most of the things i said came to pass but anyway it is not important that whoever said what was right, what is important now is that we have peace and we hope it stays that way. Everyone was trying to understand this whole situation.
That not gain said i will continue to write the story of the man on the street, at least i don't have to be a techie to give the citizen's story!!!!!!!!


There is a time for everything

I got this from Ecclesiastes 3
Everything on earth
has its own time
and its own season
there is a time
for birth and death
planting and reaping
killing and healing
destroying and building
for crying and laughing
weeping and dancing
for crying and laughing
weeping and dancing
for throwing stones :)
and gathering stones
embracing and parting
there is a time
for finding and losing
keeping and giving
for tearing and sewing
listening and speaking
there is also a time
for love and hate
for war and peace

Monday, March 03, 2008

you can't please all... President Kibaki

When the rest of Kenyans were excited at the peace deal, these are some of the nasty words that described President Kibaki
He is a coward
He is a fool
He is a push over
He can't stand by his decisions...
Well..When i rode to Thika this weekend, discussion started again
Kibaki has sold us
We would rather Matiba, he would never have sold us..Matiba and Michuki think how much of a formidable force that would have been. The people discussed on and off of how weak the President is.
I don't know, i have not been in a position to want to talk about it myself because no community owns the presidency. Obviously some people feel aggrieved but i can be honest that it has been a much easier, relaxing time for me and i think everyone feels that way.
I don't know if there is greater courage than giving up on something when you know everyone else will brand you a coward.
And yes you can't please everyone all the time.